Darker Days
by WerewolfCookie
Summary: Zuko hasn't seen Aang since he handed him over to the Fire Lord 5 years ago. Zuaang. INDEFINITE HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is an Aang/Zuko fic, dedicated specifically to all the fantastic people in the Zuaang Closet over on Distant Horizons.

Disclaimer: I cry myself to sleep every night, thinking about how I don't own Avatar.

_I tried to hold onto the boy. It was more difficult than I would have imagined; although he was barely more than half my weight, he was powerful and his Airbending skills were impressive. I knew I wouldn't be able to hold him for long, but if I could knock him out…_

_I was focused on what I was trying to do and didn't anticipate the whip of water that came to smack me around the head. The Avatar broke free from my grip. Cursing, I whirled round to the Waterbender and blasted her with a jet of fire. She screamed as it burned her face, hands and chest._

"_Katara!" screamed the Water Tribe boy, running to her side._

"_K-Katara…" breathed the Avatar. Then he turned to me. "What have you done!" he shrieked. His eyes and tattoos glowed, and I was knocked to the ground by a gust of wind. I tried to stand, but the wind held me down, stinging my face. Through half-opened eyes I saw the Avatar kneeling at the girl's side. _

"_Aang…" she whispered. "Aang, don't give up. I believe you can save the world…" _

_He grasped her hand and the glowing faded. The wind stopped blowing, tears rolled down his cheeks and I knew the Waterbender was dead._

_Getting to my feet, I stalked over to the girl's body. Her hands and face were blotched with burn marks, her clothes were blackened and the stench of burning hair and flesh hung in the air. Her brother was crouched next to her body, sobbing uncontrollably. The Avatar knelt at her side, still holding her hand, his face tearstained. I grabbed him roughly by the shoulder, but he didn't resist. He just stared at her as I pulled him to his feet._

_The Water Tribe boy rose slightly and looked up at me. Then he leapt up and bellowed, "You bastard! Get away from Aang or I'll – "_

_I cut him off by pointing a tiny ball of flame at the unconscious Earthbender. I had knocked her out as she slept when I first invaded the camp, and she now lay sprawled on the ground. "Back off, or you and the blind girl will end up just like your sister."_

_I saw the rage and pain on his face, and also the conflict. I knew he didn't care if he died avenging his sister. But I also knew that he didn't want to be responsible for the death of the Earthbender. He growled and took a step towards me._

"_Sokka. It's okay," murmured the Avatar. "I'll go. Katara…" His voice wavered, but he continued, "Katara wouldn't want you to get hurt."_

_The older boy broke down sobbing for his sister and for his friend as I led the Avatar away. _

My eyes snapped open and I realised that it was just a dream. Just the same dream I'd had every night for the past five years. That day changed my life forever. It was the day my father accepted me back into the family; the day I became a prince again; the day the Fire Nation essentially won the war. But I couldn't remember it as a victory. I tried not to remember that day at all, but it kept coming back to haunt me.

I hadn't seen the Avatar since handing him over to my father five years ago, but I was sure he was still alive and I thought I knew where he was being kept. That was why I was so careful to avoid the palace dungeons; I didn't think I could handle the guilt that would come with seeing him again.

I sat up in bed and wiped the cold sweat from my forehead. Knowing I wouldn't get back to sleep, I lit the lamps in my bedroom and pushed the bed covers off my body. I was wearing nothing but loose black pants, so I dressed quickly then crept out into the hallway. I tiptoed down the hall until I reached my destination. Without knocking, I opened the door slightly and slipped inside.

I shook the old man gently. His eyes opened slightly and he blinked. "Zuko?" he murmured.

"Hello, Uncle," I replied. "We need to talk."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I sipped on the tea as we discussed my nightmares. I hadn't talked to my uncle like this for so long; our relationship suffered because of that day five years ago. I still remembered the look on his face when I brought the Avatar back to our camp, tears streaming down his face. And the first thing he said to me was, "Zuko, what have you done?"

Now, as we talked, I could see that my uncle was still deeply disappointed in my actions on that day. As I explained my nightmare to him, he frowned. "Prince Zuko, do you regret what you did on that day?" he asked.

I pondered my answer. "How can I?" I replied finally. "My actions have restored my honour."

"Maybe, if you find honour in attacking a child as they sleep, or killing an innocent girl."

"Uncle, I captured the Avatar! I fulfilled my mission! If it weren't for me, both of us would still be living like refugees. If it weren't for me we would have lost the war!"

My uncle sighed deeply. "Even if you won't admit to yourself that what you did was wrong, your dreams show that your heart is telling you otherwise." He took a sip of his tea then continued, "Zuko, have you seen the Avatar since that day?"

I shook my head.

"Maybe… Maybe that will help your nightmares. Visiting the boy."

"Uncle, no!" I groaned. "Don't you have some herbal tea or something? Anything else that will help?"

He winked at me. "Zuko, it may surprise you, but tea is not the cure for everything. Go, visit the Avatar. It will help, I promise." And he gave me that same warm smile he used to give me before that day all those years ago.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The dungeons were cold, dark and gloomy; everything a dungeon should be. I shouldn't be here, I kept telling myself. I should leave. But I wanted the nightmares to stop, and I couldn't help feeling some sort of dark curiosity as to what had become of the great Avatar. Knowing my father, I expected the worst.

I glanced around at the ragged convicts. No Avatar. He wouldn't be kept in just any cell. These men were rebels and petty criminals; the Avatar was the most important prisoner in these dungeons. I approached one of the guards.

"You!" I boomed.

He bowed hastily. "Y-yes, my lord?" he stammered in reply.

"Take me to the Avatar immediately."

"R-right away, sir."

He hurried to lead me to the Avatar. We reached the door, a tall, heavy cast-iron thing, and the guard started fumbling with his keys. When he finally unlocked the door, I realised he intended to enter with me. I held up a hand to stop him. "I would like to do this alone."

"But sir… it could be dangerous… surely you would rather I – "

"Leave me!" I roared.

He bowed again as he backed away. "Whatever pleases you, my lord."

I took a deep breath and pushed open the door.

Even though I knew that it wouldn't be a pleasant sight, what I saw was far from what I had been expecting. Somehow I had imagined the same happy-go-lucky child I had been chasing all those years ago. Instead I was met with a very different sight. The boy in front of me would have been about seventeen. He was skeletally thin and his chest was bare, revealing cuts and bruises. He had been chained to the wall by his wrists and ankles, but the chains were long, allowing him to sit or lie down. At the moment he was slumped against the wall staring forlornly into space. I hesitated and then stepped into the room, closing the door behind me.

The sound of the door closing caught his attention. He looked up at me and his eyes narrowed. "You. What do you want?"

"I just wanted to see how my prisoner was doing," I replied, gazing around the cell.

He didn't answer, so I turned my back on him and continued to examine the cell. The whole room was metal rather than stone, supposedly to prevent him from Earthbending. There had to be something else preventing him from bending though, otherwise I was sure that the very air in this room would be attacking me.

From behind me I heard him ask, "Zuko. What are you really here for?"

"That's none of your concern. I don't have to explain myself to prisoners, Avatar."

"If you've come to gloat, go ahead. Get it over with."

"I haven't come to gloat."

"Then why are you here? To look at what I've become?"

"Avatar. That's not why I'm here."

"You haven't laid eyes on me for five years; what are you doing here now? It's not like you've come to apologise."

I hadn't known what to expect when I talked to the Avatar, but it wasn't this.

"You know… you've really changed," I told him.

"You haven't changed at all." He turned away from me and hugged his knees to his chest.

"Maybe I should go," I muttered. "But Aang – I have changed."

I could only see part of his face, but I saw the half-smile on his lips. "Thank you."

"For what?"

He turned to meet my eyes. "You called me by my name. That's the first time you've done that. The first time anyone's done that for years. Thank you."

He turned away from me again, and I backed out the door, shutting it again behind me and leaving the guard to lock it.

Something the Avatar said stayed with me long after I left the palace dungeons. _You haven't changed at all… _I had changed, I knew I had. And I was going to prove it to him no matter what.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Wow! So many reviews! You guys are fantastic! Thank you so much for reviewing, it was really motivating for me. I get the impression you guys have high expectations for this fic, so I hope it lives up to them. Argh, I'm a terrible updater, but I've had so many exams and finals, so I've been really stressed out. But if you guys keep up with the reviews, maybe it'll inspire me to write faster next time? Heh, no, I won't review-beg, but I will try to get the next chapter up faster. Promise. _

_Disclaimer: Sniffle I don't own Avatar._

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I didn't have the nightmare that night, but only because I didn't get to sleep. I couldn't get the thought of Aang out of my head. The way he looked the last time I saw him. He didn't just look unhealthy; he looked hopeless. And he told me I hadn't changed. To him, I was still the same person who killed the Waterbender, who threatened his friends, and who felt no remorse for his actions. I could understand how he could see me that way; what I couldn't understand was why I cared so much.

I thought about him all day. I had to see him again. I resolved to visit him that afternoon, but something got in my way; something called Azula.

I was heading down to see Aang when I bumped into Azula, quite literally. Coming round a corner, we collided head on and I fell to the ground. Azula dusted herself off and checked her clothes, fixing me with an icy glare. "Where are you going in such a hurry, Zuzu?" she sneered.

"I told you not to call me that!" I snapped.

"You didn't answer my question," she replied.

"It's none of your business, Azula!"

"Well, whatever you're doing, you do have duties, you know. Being Prince of the Fire Nation isn't all about a life of luxury and the promise of power. Perhaps, if you're not willing to act more like a prince, it would have been better for everyone if you had just stayed banished. I'm sure Father would have preferred it," she smirked, nodding at my scar.

Ever since I had been accepted back into the royal family, the scar had bothered me more than ever before. It was a permanent reminder of my disgrace, and it would forever mark me as the idiot I had been, and the son my father wished had never been born. I scowled at Azula's remark and stormed off.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

(Third Person POV)

Prince Zuko. What an annoyance. A thorn in her side. Things would have been so much better if he had just stayed banished, or better yet, if she had disposed of him before he was welcomed home.

For two short years, Azula stood to become Fire Lady when Ozai died. Then Zuko made his return, and everything changed. As Ozai's firstborn son, Zuko was the heir to the kingdom and would someday become Fire Lord. And that bothered Azula. It bothered her a lot.

She was the better Firebender, the better leader, the more mature, the more intelligent. Zuko had stolen her birthright, and she wasn't going to take it lying down. Azula had never been one to take anything lying down.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

(Zuko's POV)

I was keen to get away from Azula and hurried down to the dungeons faster than usual. When I arrived, I found the same guard that had tried to stop me from entering the Avatar's cell yesterday. Today he was much quicker to open the door and allow me in.

Aang lay curled up on the stone floor, eyes closed, looking peaceful. I stood completely still, breathing softly, scared I would wake him. He looked so calm, and I felt I could just stay there, staring at him forever…

The moment was ruined by that idiot guard slamming the cell door, waking Aang.

I winced as he sat up with a start. "Zuko?" he gasped. "What are you – "

I took a few steps toward him. "I just came to see you," I replied, kneeling down so that our eyes met. His wide eyes were full of mistrust; I sighed, realising that he thought of me as a monster. I tried to place a calming hand on his shoulder, but he flinched away from me. "I'm not trying to hurt you," I protested.

"Then what are you here for?" he asked.

"I already told you, I came to see you."

He didn't argue, and both of us were silent for a while. It was an awkward, heavy silence, and I needed to break it. I needed to say something, anything...

"Are you… are you doing okay?"

I couldn't bring myself to look at him when I said that, because I already knew the answer. The cuts and bruises, the chains digging into skin, the ribs poking out from under his smooth, pale skin… they were answer enough.

I didn't look up, even when he answered, but I heard the whispered, "I'm fine."

He clearly wasn't fine, but I understood; he wanted to end the conversation, wanted me to leave. Sighing, I got to my feet and took a few steps toward the door.

"Zuko?"

I paused when I heard Aang's voice behind me.

"Will you be back tomorrow?"

Did I hear hope in his voice? Or was that just wishful thinking? I hesitated, not sure how to respond.

"I – I'll try," I replied eventually, before pushing open the door and leaving.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I wanted to visit Aang the next day. Even though he treated me with suspicion and mistrust, I wanted to spend time with him. For years I had been surrounded by the corrupt and the power-hungry, people who plotted against one another and who tried to please those with power over them. Aang wasn't like that. I found his presence refreshing, even if it did fill me with guilt every time I saw his perfect, fragile body covered with bruises.

But even though I wanted to see him, I couldn't keep visiting him every day. Azula was right, a prince had duties. I couldn't continue to waste my time. Besides, Aang didn't want me to visit him. He hated me for what I did to the Waterbender, and what I did to him. My efforts to make things right and earn his forgiveness only made him suspicious. Surely things would be better for everyone if I just stopped visiting the Avatar. The problem was, I didn't think I could. The more I thought about not seeing Aang again, the more I realised just how much I wanted to.

I realised that, almost for the first time, I was seeing Aang as a person, not a prize. With this realisation came a strange mix of feelings; sympathy, compassion, guilt and self-disgust, all rolled into one. I couldn't bear to think of what the Fire Nation had done – what _I_ had done – to hurt Aang so much.

As I lay there exhaustion overcame me and I fell into a fitful sleep. I was having a nightmare, but this time I didn't see myself murder the Waterbender. This dream was entirely worse.

_Aang knelt on the ground, trembling, frightened and half-naked, hands in manacles. A shadow fell over him, cast by a dark figure. I couldn't make it out very clearly in the poor light; the entire scene was lit by fire, which surrounded the two figures. I saw the fear and horror in Aang's face; I saw how he shuffled backward, trying to get further away from the dark shape, but was trapped by the flames._

_And I heard the laugh as the figure raised a hand and Aang was engulfed in fire._

_I screamed, cried out to Aang, cried to the Firebender to stop, but I couldn't even hear my own voice. Once the flames had subsided I stared, horror-struck, at Aang's body. It was blackened and charred, and his face was horribly burned, just like… Just like mine had been._

_Tears pricked my eyes, and through the tears and smoke and flames I saw the Firebender who had done this to Aang. He looked up at me and grinned, and I recognised that awful scar over his left eye, that mark I hated so much. I screamed._

I awoke in a cold sweat, breathing heavily. I knew I had to keep visiting Aang; I had caused him so much pain already, and I had to find a way to make it up to him.

_A/N: Erm, yeah, this chapter didn't come out as well as I'd hoped. Zuko's dream sequence at the end is based on Aang's vision in the season finale. You know the one, where he's opening the chakras, and he has to picture what he fears? Yeah, that one. I promise the next chapter will be better, longer and up faster. Thanks guys._


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